I hate losing weight ... or should I say, I hate the process. I'm terrible at it, however, I really do need to shed quite a few pounds. I started on that journey about three months ago and have lost 20 lbs so far. I dithered about whether or not to share this, but I know there is more than just me in this same unstable boat!! The reason that I finally decided to share is that I've had some disappointments about the weight loss. if you know someone who really struggles with weight loss (and especially if you have never been in a fat body yourself!), don't pass along negative comments to them. Always keep things positive. Encouragement, I find is the key to either make it or break it.
I have for the past three weeks fallen off the diet wagon, and I have to admit it was for two reasons. One was the fact that my schedule has been in the pits lately with both of my kids being home with me. My son has been home because the high school teachers have been on strike for the past 5 1/2 weeks!!!! (INSERT ANGER WORDS OF YOUR CHOICE!!) And my daughter is home from university, and although she does finally (thank goodness!!) have summer employment, it's only part time. So my kids who can be a tad lazy needy, are constantly asking for food ... breakfast, lunch, and snacks. It's so hard to prepare food for others of the tasty kind when all you're allowed is lettuce (well, not really, but you know what I mean).
Secondly, and on top of all of that, a certain someone made a rather mean and thoughtless comment to me a couple of weeks ago, and it completely shot my determination out the window. They let me know with no uncertainty that I was wasting my time, and all the weight I lost would come back. It really made me feel horrible. And to be honest, I have lost a lot of weight before, and gained back almost (but not quite) all of it. It just isn't the sort of discouraging thoughts I need in my head. Don't you find that dieting is a lot more psychological rather than physical? I have to argue with myself all day long to eat the proper foods, constantly playing mind games with myself to keep on track. It's mentally exhausting!
Today high school teachers have been legislated back to work. After almost six weeks of strike our government ruled that their strike has been found to be illegal ... about bloody time! And today, with my daughter at work, my son in school, and my routine restored, I have gotten back on the diet. I can't say whether I will reach my goal or not. And actually I haven't even set a "goal", because I plan on eating this way from now on. One of those "it's not a diet, it's a way of eating" food management things. Yes, I am following a plan, and actually if you're interested the book I've been using is "The GI Diet" by Rick Gallop. This diet really works. The first part of the book is a diet, and the second part of the book is maintaining good eating habits for life. This is how I lost weight before, but I slid further and further away from it because I got lazy. My brother-in-law lost over 100 lbs following this diet, and he has kept it off for about six years. I admire him for his will power ... I know some days it can still be tricky.
And that's really all I wanted to say. Be kind to those who struggle with weight loss. It's not funny. It's hard work! And it takes a loooOOOooooong time to achieve good results. I'd like to say to anyone who is currently dieting, or just eating better: Good for you! I understand how hard it is to rationalize every bite you take, but keep your eye on the prize, and you'll get there in the end!! If you fall off the wagon, don't despair. Wake up to a new day and a fresh start with a firm resolution that you CAN do this. Don't allow all that effort of dieting for days or weeks or months to be wasted ... get back into the good routine of eating healthy again TODAY! As my niece told me, it takes 21 days for a new thing (like eating healthy) to become a habit. So if it's early in the game for you, keep heart and get past the three-week mark for it to become a little bit (or hopefully a lot!) easier.
I am at the realization now that my weight will not all come off before summer. I think I was sort of panicking about that at first. And that one ill-timed and unfortunate comment to me made me feel like it was all hopeless. But today I have a new determination, and I have to just get through one day at a time, right?! Maybe next month won't find me wearing the shorts that I bought the first time I lost weight. But hopefully at the end of summer I'll feel a whole lot better, and I'll be able to treat myself to some new clothes for fall ;)
Thanks for listening to my little rambling today ... I hope to soon have some gardening photos for you next time :)
Wendy
Good luck, Wendy! You can do it. One day at a time. And don't let indulgences ruin your day, or week. Just start over where you are. I said a prayer for you today.
ReplyDeleteHugs, Beth
Hello Wendy, I have been there done that too. Exercise is my main problem and a lack of sleep. I feel if you get off your diet for one day or meal just get back on the next day.. Dieting is hard and it does not help if people around you are negative. One day at a time, you can do it! Love the photos, enjoy your day and the rest of the week!
ReplyDeleteWell done you for the weight you have lost and for keeping on going and for having such a great attitude about it. I am glad to hear that your son is back to school btw! So sorry about the person who made the nasty comment, if you point me in their direction I will give them a piece of my mind for you! Grrr!!! You know I get very cross on behalf of my friends!!! I hope that you reach all of your goals, whatever they might be!!!! Well done you!!!!! xx
ReplyDeleteWeight loss is very hard work. My husband lost over 100 lbs in the early years of our marriage and has kept it off. He is very inspiring to me but it still doesn't make it any easier. I'm sorry that someone was negative toward you. That is totally inappropriate and you deserve support and kindness on your weight-loss journey. I wish you all the best. Take care.
ReplyDeleteYou can do it Wendy! Sure, it is hard but it is worth doing and even if there are difficult days and times when you slide off the Waggon you can always get yourself back on track. Don't let negative remarks get you down. 20lb is a fantastic achievement already!
ReplyDeleteOh Wendy - I just love this! I'm definitely one of those who struggles with the daily mind games of staying on track as well. I've been the same size 16 forever and will sometimes go down to 14 and fluctuate that way and I'd really LOVE to be a size 10!! But it takes regular work for me just to maintain my weight so I give myself credit for that at least. I know exactly what you mean about how comments work and can sabotage things. You are SO not alone!!
ReplyDeleteI have a fitbit now and love it. It really keeps me on track to get my minimum of 10,000 steps a day and I always shoot for anything above that. Keep setting little goals and reward yourself with pats on the back regularly!! You've got it right on the mark with needing to keep the positivity flowing if you're going to stay on track. Just know you have a neighbor from northern WI in the states cheering you on! You're doing awesome and keep up the great work!!
xoxo
It is HARD!!! I know! And it's even harder to keep it off. I've given up certain foods and sometimes I feel sorry for myself that I can't eat them. lol But having said that. I always tell friends that be happy if you are healthy. Celebrate being healthy regardless of your weight and it makes staying on a 'diet' easier. Encouragement is nice but you have to rely on yourself in the long run. And I'm glad you talked about it on your blog...it's good for us to talk about it and share experiences! I'm proud of you my friend! Hugs, Diane
ReplyDeleteSo well written Wendy! I am in the same boat as you as having 3 beans close together has made it a bit hard to shed the pounds.....and yes....it is such a mental game. Good for you for losing that 20 and taking this on as a way of being rather than a diet. I BELIEVE IN YOU!!!! And your garden shots are beautiful!!! Wishing you all the best my friend! Nicole xo
ReplyDeleteWell done for sticking with it. Have you tried the SparkPeople website http://www.sparkpeople.com/
ReplyDeleteThere is lots of support and many success stories to inspire you. I lost 30 lbs with them and login every day for a dose of encouragement.
You are doing well and keep it up. I have lost 40lbs so far myself and it has been very hard. I want to lose 20lbs more. I am not very good with staying on a diet, so I eat everything but I portion control very heavily. I also allow myself treat days. It's a small reward system for being good. I stay active with regular workout, garden work, etc. Of course everyone's schedule and need are different. It's really horrible when people say such discouraging things, it's none of their business. This is something you are doing for yourself, something really good. Once you find what works for you, take your time and don't get frustrated. It will happen :)
ReplyDelete-Soma
Losing weight is one of the hardest things to do. Good on you Wendy; you are doing wonderfully...keep on going! People do at times say the most insensitive things don't they. As you say just take each day as it comes and before you know you will be down to your goal weight. You are such an encouragement to others.
ReplyDeleteWendy, I'm so sorry you got a discouraging comment. Sometimes people don't realize what damage a negative remark can do. (And sometimes, unfortunately, people are just jerks.) I hope the process of writing this post has helped to put it behind you. Every day is a new start! And BIG congrats on the 20 pounds lost already!
ReplyDeleteGood luck with your diet..20 lbs already is great !! Keep up the good work..
ReplyDeleteHi Wendy, I don't like the word diet because it definitely needs to be a lifestyle change. To me, diet is constricting. Eating should not be a chore. It it something we should enjoy. And it is something that is necessary for survival. 10 years ago I totally changed my eating and lost 30 lbs. I also worked my butt off to get in shape. I've maintained the weight loss but can't say I've maintained a toned body. In fact, for some reason lately, I feel bloated all the time and my clothes are tight. Someone said it may be water retention because of the heat. All I know is I don't feel like myself at all. There are a bunch of people in my workplace who are doing the meal replacement diets that are calorie restricted. I've shared my views with them and don't say it to be mean, but to be honest. They are happy they are losing weight. Any time you restrict your calories you will lose weight. But having less than 1000 calories a day is not healthy for anyone and is not something you can maintain for a long period of time. At some point, they will be sick and tired of packaged foods and have to learn to eat real foods. And if you don't learn to eat the right real foods, then you will definitely gain weight again. So many people just don't understand food in general and have wrong ideas about a balanced diet. I definitely do not believe the food pyramid guidelines that the FDA puts out. My advice, don't buy anything in a package. If there's more than 5 ingredients in something, you don't need it. And if you can't pronounce what is in something, don't buy it. I do believe in snacks. Three meals a day would never work with me. One friend currently is doing a morning smoothie, lunch and an evening smoothie. Nothing else. She plans to do it for 6 months. There is no way I would make it. I am constantly snacking on fruit, dried or fresh, nuts, and do this all day long. Lately for dinner I've been having nice cream. No dairy, only frozen fruit blended with either water, juice or almond milk, just enough so that you come out with a soft serve texture. I top it with cacao nibs and walnuts or pecans. Sometimes coconut, or pomegranate, depending on the combination I have made. Hmmm, anywhos, this is a subject that I could go on about forever. I wish you all the best. It is definitely a mindset. Once I decided I needed to lose weight and get in shape, I never looked back. A few years later I became vegetarian and a few years after I gave up all dairy which was the best thing I ever did. It's not just food though. The older we get, the more we need to stay active. That's the part that I struggle with it is 115 degrees outside. :)
ReplyDeleteAs for the teacher strike. that is awful. I get that teachers are underpaid, but what about all those students? We had a big shake-up at school yesterday. I've been mostly home the past couple of days even though I am officially supposed to be working until June 7th. Not sure what will happen next week but I am so ready to close the door on that chapter of my life and start fresh.
Take care! Tammy
I'm so sorry someone made such a thoughtless comment to you. Have you ever read the Weighty Matters blog by Yoni Freehoff? It's excellent, and he has written a book called The Diet Fix. Here's a link in case you're interested .http://www.weightymatters.ca
ReplyDeleteWendy, good for you for doing the hard work. It is hard, isn't it? 20 pounds in three months is really good!! It is discouraging that it goes so slowly, but you don't want to lose any faster than that. Just be patient with yourself; slow and steady wins the race. It does help so much to have help and encouragement. I would sit your family down and tell them you need their help with this, and that they need to keep a private stash of goodies for themselves, out of your sight. Cook them healthy meals, and let them snack out of your sight. I could not do this if I had tempting foods around me when my willpower is weak. It might sound harsh, but tell them they deserve a healthy mama!
ReplyDeleteIt is a mind game for sure. And a lifestyle change. I'll be rooting for you! Blessings, xo Deborah
People can be so thoughtless but try not to let their comments get to you. I think most of us struggle to eat the right things all of the time, there is so much temptation out there it's hard to resist. Having so much pain because gallstones was the thing that finally put me on the right track and I managed to lose 10 pounds over 3 months by cutting out cakes, biscuits, crisps and chocolate and exercise is key, going to the gym 3 times a week makes you feel so much fitter. Now that I'm convalescing and not able to get to the gym I'm afraid those pounds are going to creep back on again. but all naughty foods are banned in the house because if I see them I will eat them but I always have nuts, dried fruits and seeds to snack on. It sounds as if you are doing well Wendy so don't be too hard on yourself you will get there in the end. I can remember way back a hundred years ago when I was doing my O levels the teachers were on strike too, it severely affected our exam results, I'm glad it's going to get sorted and hope that it doesn't affect your sons studies too much. Have a great weekend. xxx
ReplyDeleteI don't really struggle with weight loss as such, but even trying to eat a healthy diet seems so much more do-able when it's just me and the hubby. As soon as the kids are back from uni, etc, and need feeding their kind of food, my healthy eating goes out the window! It's hard to shop and cook for lots of different eating regimes - stressful enough to drive you to eat more!! But, hey, well done you for persevering. You can do it!! Just cut out the bad stuff and replace with fruit, nuts, etc. It does work! Oh, and that other thing .... exercise! Good luck with it! xCathy
ReplyDeleteOh Wendy yes it's hard to eat healthy when the kids are around for the summer! I wish you luck with everything! Take care and have a lovely weekend.
ReplyDeleteJulie xo
It's a hard thing to lose weight and keep it off. We've been using My Fitness Pal for 2 years now, hubby has lost close to 80 pounds and I've lost about 30. It watches calories and intake, so not really a diet. You will do great with your diet. It was good to hear the big school kids went back to school.
ReplyDeleteWendy, congratulations on already losing twenty pounds! I'm sending you lots of "stay strong and focused" vibes!
ReplyDeleteBlessings,
Victoria
Goodness Wendy, 20 pounds is a big accomplishment and don't let negative minded people pull you down. I need to lose weight but don't have the willpower, like we've all determined, you have to have the mind set to lose pounds.
ReplyDeleteTake it one day at a time and know we're all behind you.
This has been a fun evening of visiting and discussion, first with Deborah about going naturally gravy and with you about losing weight. Two things on my mind as I get older.
Keep up the good work, I'm envious of your success!
I wish you luck with this, I know it's tricky .... but take care !
ReplyDeleteI am with Tammy and some of the others that diet is never a good word-since it is a mental game too choose a word that works better for you-new lifestyle of eating is a good way to put it. and I always say too positiveness is the best-don't think about what you can't eat but what you can eat-and also look at a favorite recipe and change it to healthier-I have needed to that now for at least 20 years or more-change a recipe to diabetic friendly, and then add heart healthy for hubby, and then gluten free all in the same recipe-it can be an adventure with food recipes too-at least that is how I approached it and since hubby is the diabetic and heart patient but loves sweets I needed to make things that he could eat so it has a big lifestyle change for us as well. and the older we get the more difficult it is unless we add more physical activity which has always been my downfall keep us posted Wendy I use my blog all the time for rants and support-hugs
ReplyDeleteWendy,
ReplyDeleteI must tell you this, you are an incredible woman and a great support to many of us. Your thoughtful, caring, kind and encouraging words have and continue to make such a difference in my life! Weight loss is a bug-a-boo for most of us and we are all there at different seasons of life. I am excited for you and the weight loss that you have achieved and you know it will be even easier now that the weather has broken and you will be out in your lovely, beautiful and wonderful yard. So you go girl and you remember that Jemma is your cheer leader!
Thank you for supporting me through my move!
xoxo
Jemma
I like to think that life, like many of the projects we undertake, is a journey. We may get there in the end, we may not, hopefully we'll enjoy the road and learn something in the process. But it is always better than standing still. Never ever let the mean people win! You're a blogger!
ReplyDeleteAmalia
xo